Not Baby Related

Things have been incredibly stressful for Daniel and me these past few weeks. We're adjusting to him working second shift instead of going to school this semester, he's having to deal with me being an awful cranky person, and we're also having to balance our newlywed status while trying to keep all of our old friends and find time for the new ones we're making. With Zooey's due date rapidly approaching, we were hoping some things would smooth out and just fall into place for us. However, it doesn't seem like that's going to happen.

Daniel is in the Air Force (Guard) and that means he gets to take a little trip down to Columbia once a month and work at the base for the weekend. Normally, he would leave around 5 AM to get there on time. With his new schedule that just isn't realistic- neither is leaving work early one Friday out of every month. He's been in contact with his commanding officer several times since we knew he'd be starting second shift, trying to work out a schedule that would keep him at work but not away from his guard duties. Apparently, there's nothing this guy can do to give Daniel even a little wiggle room. I'm sure it isn't his fault, but at the same time I don't like having my husband calling me from work so upset he can barely have a conversation. On top of all that, they're pushing him to take a deployment that will start the beginning of June and end in August. If he takes it, Zooey will barely be 3 months old when he leaves and when he comes back he'll be right back to school again (don't get me wrong- I can't wait for him to go back to school). That just means I'll have to go back to work sooner and play single parent for a little while. Even if its the best financial option in the long run, can we handle all the stress it will inevitably put on us?

I'm just frustrated. It felt like everything was going fine and suddenly we have this huge road block ahead of us. I don't know what to do or how to fix it- or if there's a way I even can fix it.

Updating on time: 34 weeks!

How far along?
34 weeks- so close!
Maternity clothes?
Yes~ We went by Plato's Closet today and I found myself being creepy around the dress rack, whispering to them "soooon". I'm weird. So what?
Stretch marks?
Might make it through this with none, despite all the nay-sayers.
Sleep?
Ugh, what is sleep? I woke up every hour last night bc I couldn't stay comfortable. Everything hurts all the time and I have to pee constantly. Am I done being pregnant yet?
Best moment this week?
My birthday was yesterday, and I got to spend the whole day with Daniel. It was awesome!
Food cravings:
Strawberries. <3 Belly button in or out?
Still cute and flat.
Movement?
Her kicks and jabs are becoming much less cute and causing way more pain.
What I miss?
Not being in pain every time I move.
What I’m looking forward to:
The next baby shower. :)
Milestones:
"This week, your baby measures about 17¾ inches, as almost as long as an American Girl Doll (!) and weighs almost 5 pounds, as heavy as a bag of sugar, minus the cup you put in your decaf this morning."
What baby looks like this week:

34 Weeks Pregnant

Thinking Too Far Ahead?

Daniel and I have already decided what our costumes will be for our first Halloween with Zooey. While watching Parenthood (our latest Netflix obsession), he decided being an old-school baseball player would be pretty awesome.

To along with the theme, I thought I could maybe find a cute (appropriate) umpire-like outfit. (But I just found a cute female baseball player costume, so maybe we'll go with that. Who knows?) BUT the icing on the cake will be our sweet, pudgy little bundle of joy. We'll be dressing her up like a fat little baseball, complete with face paint and embroidered onesie.

This probably sounds pretty lame and I really don't care about sports in the least, but I can't get over the image of her dressed up like a little ball! :D I'm a little concerned about painting her face so maybe we'll just skip that part. ...Maybe we'll scrap this entire idea! I just know I'm excited to have my little baby girl here in my arms instead of in my tummy!

33 Weeks Today!

How far along?
33 weeks! Getting closer!
Maternity clothes?
I feel like I'm wearing the same pants every day (when I actually get dressed) and I get really down when I see all the cute, tiny clothes and bathing suits stores are putting out now. I'm ready to be thin again!
Stretch marks?
Apparently lotioning up the belly twice daily is really doing the trick. :)
Sleep?
I'm sleeping any and everywhere (took a nap in the car while waiting to pick Daniel up from work). My naps are more frequent as well, which is pretty nice.
Best moment this week?
WE GOT A CAR! No more being stuck and trying to bum rides from people! When I'm hungry I can go get food/go to the store, I can go rent a movie whenever I want! I never thought I would be so thankful for a vehicle!
Food cravings:
Baked spaghetti! (And that's only because I know Brittany and Jonathan will be cooking for us Saturday night! So excited!)
Belly button in or out?
Still cute and flat.
Movement?
She seriously won't hold still. And I've started feeling a lot of downward pressure today (really unusual, since she tends to sit so high). She's also started getting the hiccups a lot.
What I miss?
This is going to sound weird, but I really miss having my own apartment. This week I've caught myself wishing Daniel and I had just stayed in the 2 bedroom at Country Club but I know there's no way we could have afforded that (and we were planning on moving to Asheville anyway). I just miss the privacy of not living with 3 other people.
What I’m looking forward to:
Putting the crib together! We decided to tackle that project after this next baby shower!
Milestones:
"Both you and baby are putting on some serious weight at this point. You'll probably gain about a pound a week for the next few weeks, with half of that poundage bulking up baby. He'll likely double his weight in the next eight weeks."
What baby looks like this week:

33 Weeks Pregnant

Sorry!

I know I disappeared for a while there (again) but I'm back and after this week I'll have more time to update than ever! Since Daniel started working last week, I'll finally be able to quit for a while! As you may recall, work has been a major source of stress for me. It will be nice to finally be rid of it (at least for a while).

My first baby shower will be this Saturday, hosted by my lovely friends Sydni and Brittany. They know I'm a little bit of a control freak so they basically let me take the reigns and are on standby for whenever I finally decide it's too much! I waited until today to actually admit I can't do it on my own, and delegated a few tasks to them. I don't know what I'd do if I literally had to do this alone. Not having a car right now is making everything especially difficult. Daniel and I have been trying to sell our vehicles for a little over a month now. Shockingly, mine went first for a little under $2000 (obviously not enough to get a decent 4 door car), so now we're focusing all our energy on getting his truck sold in the next few weeks.

"Well, why don't you just get him to drive you around when he gets off work?" If only it were that simple. Unfortunately, he had to take a job where he'll be working 2nd shift. This is our schedule right now: I'm up at 6, out the door by 6:30 AM (thanks to my awesome mom; I'm lucky we work on the same exit)- Daniel is still sleeping. I leave work a bit after three and am home just before four. Daniel has to be at work at 4 and won't be home until at least 1 AM. We work at the same place, live in the same house and we never see each other. I'm so glad that it's only for a week! After this Friday I can stay up all night waiting for him to get home and not have to worry if I'll be tired at work the next day! Ahhh, sleepy time.

I'm really doing a lot of rambling; can't focus because I know there's Mac n Cheese I could be cooking. Mmm! So to wrap up, I give you...Top 5 Reasons I May Never Give Up Maternity Pants!
1) Virtually no muffin top!
2) No pesky zippers or buttons to deal with when you feel like your bladder is about to burst!
3) Also, you don't have to remember to zip before you leave the bathroom (a pretty big problem for me for some reason).
4) They make me feel like Joey Tribbiani at Thanksgiving Dinner (not a bad thing!).
5) All the comfort of pajama jeans, none of the shame. :)

BONUS PICTURE OF MOM

31 weeks, 4 days!

How far along?
31 weeks, 4 days
Maternity clothes?
Still really diggin' the stretchy pants deal. I'm getting kind of sick of maternity tops though. I feel like I wear the same thing, day after day (which isn't true). I've even started pilfering my husband's shirts; he doesn't care for that at all. "Wear the maternity clothes, you look pretty!"
Stretch marks?
Even though it feels like I've more than quadrupled in size, I still have no battle scars to show for it.
Sleep?
Ugh, sleep. Some nights I can be so tired that I'm a goner when my head hits the pillow. Others, I start off laying on my side but that hurts my hip and my nose drains to one side. Then I lay on my back...which hurts my tail bone and I can't breathe. It's pretty hit or miss at this point.
Best moment this week?
This week's best moment has yet to come! (Baby shower this Saturday.) But if I had to choose from what has happened so far...I'd pick what happened about 5 minutes ago. I was looking through some old Facebook stuff and I could literally see where I would be right now if I hadn't wised up. I would have been so miserable with my life! From this moment on, I vow to be so thankful for everything that my life is instead of focusing on what I think it lacks.
Food cravings:
Monterrey's cheese steak with rice and an order of mild cheese dip! (Nothing, really, until I read that. Thanks, self.)
Belly button in or out?
It started acting like it wanted to poke out a bit, but seems to have collapsed in on itself.
Movement?
WHO TAUGHT HER IN UTERO KICK BOXING?! She can literally jolt me out of my chair sometimes; it's really starting to make me sick.
What I miss?
My pre baby clothes. I bought a pretty dress for Easter, but have no idea if it will even fit by that time. Shopping used to really lift my spirits but now it just makes me depressed. Especially when I catch a reflection of myself waddling by in a full length mirror.
What I’m looking forward to:
Getting back to my pre pregnancy weight! Woo!
Milestones:
Finally into the every 2 week visits. Not much longer now...
What baby looks like this week:

31 Weeks Pregnant

How far along?
26 weeks, 1 day
Maternity clothes?
Returned the saggy maternity jeans for a few more pairs that fit better. They're so comfortable! I may dedicate an entire post to why maternity pants are awesome!
Stretch marks?
Don't want to jinx it but...still none!
Sleep?
I try to sleep in every chance I get. It takes me a while to get comfortable sometimes, but for the most part I'm done for once my head hits the pillow.
Best moment this week?
Today was probably full of this week's best moments. I spent all day with Daniel; we slept in, had breakfast together, and went to a movie. Some other not so great things happened but they just served to prove that he'll always be there for me when I really need him.
Food cravings:
Monterrey's cheese steak with rice and an order of mild cheese dip!
Belly button in or out?
It has all but disappeared, but it hasn't started to poke out at all. (Same as last week.)
Movement?
The little lady has apparently taken to tap dancing here lately.
What I miss?
I miss people understanding what personal space is.
What I’m looking forward to:
Holding our little girl! (I feel like this will be my answer for a little while.)
Milestones:
I can't think of anything really. Other than the myriad of aches and pains I'm feeling lately...
What baby looks like this week:

26 Weeks Pregnant

Since I'm feeling good today, I figured I would treat you all to an update! I feel guilty for not being as regular about it as I would have hoped, but I guess late is better than never! Picture of mommy coming soon.

How far along?
25 weeks exactly!
Maternity clothes?
I'm pretty much officially out of jeans, but the maternity pants I bought are too saggy in the front and butt. Guess I'm at a weird in between stage. I've been wearing my jeans up under my big ol' belly. I feel sloppy if I wear sweat pants every day! Just me?
Stretch marks?
STILL none, and praying none pop up!
Sleep?
Every morning it gets a little harder to roll out of bed. (I blame the cold weather than has suddenly come upon us.) Getting to sleep doesn't seem to be much of a problem though.
Best moment this week?
This has been a really rough couple of weeks for me, emotionally, so it's hard to pick a moment. Every moment with my husband is pretty much perfect.
Food cravings:
McDonald's, pizza (from anywhere really), and Snickers!
Belly button in or out?
It has all but disappeared, but it hasn't started to poke out at all.
Movement?
Zooey picks very specific times during the day when she wants to dance. Early morning and late at night, when she knows we're settling into bed. Then there are times when I move the wrong way or I start to do too much that she gives me a little nudge.
What I miss?
This will still sound ridiculous, but I miss being my normal size. And I miss being treated like a person and not just a walking belly/baby factory.
What I’m looking forward to:
Holding our little girl!
Milestones:
Getting that weird brown line on my belly and swelling every freaking where. Does that count?
What baby looks like this week:

Almost a whole month already?

I didn't mean to take three weeks away from my blog, but things haven't been going as smoothly as I hoped. Nothing is wrong with me or the baby physically. Mommy is just having a hard time adjusting to all this brand new mommy stuff. I don't like to complain about it because people just come back at you with "well, when I was pregnant, I did/gained such and such". I'm sure they're trying to be helpful, but at this point I'm just ready to start the next phase. It's hard to think sometimes that these raging kicks I feel in my stomach are from a tiny girl I'll be holding in about three months. Even though I'm getting excited, I'm still deathly afraid of having to be her mother.

Weight is one thing that is a major issue for me. I realize everyone wants to punch me in the face when I complain about how big I've gotten, but it's just one of those things that is going to be difficult to me. Jumping about 10 pounds at my last two doctor visits wasn't really encouraging like I guess it should have been. I've never passed 100 pounds in my life, so it's hard to look at the scale and see these big numbers and feel the pressure to lose it after Zooey finally comes. I don't like having to pack away clothes and eat with my jeans unbuttoned or have to change into sweat pants to be comfortable. I miss my flat stomach and cute clothes and 90 pounds. I miss not having to wear maternity tops that make me look like a puffed up balloon. I literally had a major breakdown before we went out with some friends Wednesday night because I wanted to wear a tee shirt (it was a little too tight) and Daniel wanted me to wear a maternity top instead. I'm sure it had a lot to do with my hormones being off kilter but some of it was just me wanting to me normal around normal people. (Of course, when you're pregnant and in a bar, nothing is normal.)

I'm also dealing with extreme amounts of guilt. I'm sure most of you realize the announcement of our little girl was very much a shock. We had plans. We were planning our move to Asheville where Daniel would go to school and pursue his major while I worked to support us for a while. Only after school (and lots of travelling) would we think about kids. So mommy-dom wasn't a looming thing; it was 5 or so years down the road. We planned originally to get married next year, but we had to push things up and tie the knot this October with minimal planning and a very minimal guest list. I feel like it's my fault that Daniel can't go out and do what he wants anymore, that he's stuck here with his big pregnant wife while his friends are taking trips and going out to bars and generally enjoying their 20s. This probably sounds ridiculous to 95% of you, but maybe there are a few out there that have felt the same.

It just gets hard to act excited when your emotions are being all crazy on the other end of the scale.

Registered!

Daniel and I finally tackled the daunting task of completing our baby registry! From start to finish it was an ordeal. Maybe it was our mistake for going the night of a midnight CoD release, but when we walked up to the appropriate counter there wasn't a sales associate around for several departments. There was no way to call one to the desk either. We basically had to scour the entire store to find some help. ...Then wait another 20 minutes for them to make their way over. No one seemed to know what to do! It seemed like everything was totally chaotic! I was uncharacteristically patient that night, though, so I just smiled while they sorted through our papers and handed us THE scanner! I didn't even have to fight for it- Daniel didn't want it for some odd reason. We scanned everything- from blankets to hangers, breast pumps (ewwwww) to teethers, monitors to high chairs. It was difficult for us to choose what did and didn't belong on our registry- too expensive, too obvious? But after about 40 minutes we felt like we had all our bases covered. We returned the scanner, gathered our freebie bag, and came home for a relaxing evening of snuggles. :)



Oh, and if you're interested in checking out our registry, here it is: Babies"R"Us - Baby Registry



Otherwise, nothing fun has really happened (but it's only Tuesday). Still looking for a car. Wanting to sell the Miata so Daniel won't have to part with his truck. It's in much better condition and you always need a truck more than a sports car! Also still looking into the 3D ultrasound thing. I'm really in it for the heartbeat teddy bear. Just have to keep saving!



Wondering what baby is looking like this week? Mama sure doesn't want anyone to see how big she's gotten! :(